Back in 1993, suddenly my household was no longer a single person household. One day in mid-August, it became a two person household…..and it stayed that way until 2001. And, then just as suddenly…..it became a one person household again.

Those eight years were some of the most satisfying years of my life. And, when it came to an end, it most certainly left an empty spot in my life. Those were the years that I had a foreign exchange student living with me…..except for a couple unhappy exceptions, that I constantly try to forget even happened.

Let me tell you how all of this happened. It definitely was not by design….it was not planned. In fact, it came about purely by accident……and maybe by lucky coincidence…..maybe by fate. Who know? But….it did happen. And I am a better person because of it. My association with eight—-again, give or take one or two…..outstanding young men enriched and enlightened my life in ways that I had never anticipated. And, the experience keeps on giving, even until today.

After I retired in 2003, it was no longer practical for me to host high school students. While I was still working at the school, it was a perfect situation. They could ride to school with me in the morning…..and ride back home with me after school. I may be generous and benevolent…..but, I am also practical…..and a little bit selfish, too. For eight years I woke up at 5:30 A.M…..got myself ready to go to work…..and then about 6:30 A.M., it was time to wake up the exchange student so he could get ready in time to leave for school about 7:15 A.M. And….let’s just say that waking up a sleeping 17 or 18 year old boy is not the easiest job in the world. It takes persistence….and sometimes a very loud voice.

When I finally retired….after sticking it out until the bitter end…..I was no longer in the mood to rouse myself out of bed at 5:30…..especially not for the sole purpose of driving a kid to school. Call me selfish…..but…well….just call me selfish. And….add to that….I would have to be at the school at 3:30 to pick him up and take him back home again. No…..that didn’t sound like a lot of fun. Oh, yes…..of course, they could have ridden the school bus. The school bus goes right past my home. But, while I may be just a little bit selfish…..I am not a mean person. To make a senior in high school ride the school bus every day with a bunch of kindergarten kids…..and first, second, third graders. Well, that is just being mean! No self-respecting high school kid rides the school bus any longer. It would be humiliating…..and I didn’t want to humiliate my exchange student.

And, of course, there was also the problem of what to do with them when I happened to be out of town for a couple days……or when I spent the month of April in Germany. (That’s sort of ironic, isn’t it? Most of my exchange students were German.)

No…..it just made more sense not to host exchange students any longer. For years, I had exchange student organizations calling me….sending e-mails….almost begging me to take an exchange student. There is an almost desperate need for host parents. A dozen or more exchange student organizations are all competing to place students. And, instead of accepting only those for whom they have found a home……they accept almost anybody who can pay the small fortune it costs to become an exchange student. Consequently, there is often a real glut of unplaced students for whom the organizations are frantically looking to place in a home.

OK. But…..back to my story.

How did I happen to become a host parent? As I said, it was almost by accident….or fate.

One summer afternoon I was in town, and I was walking out of the post office when I ran into a couple friends of mine. They had hosted several foreign exchange students in the past. Actually, I knew a couple of them fairly well. One of them had been a volunteer basketball coach on Saturday morning when I was in charge of the grade school intramural program. He was a good kid….somewhat more mature and serious than some of our high school students….at that time in history. Another of their foreign exchange students was on the high school cross-country team which I coached. He was a good kid….somewhat more mature and serious than some of our high school students….at that time in history. I liked both of these kids….and both of them did a good job and took their roles seriously.

Anyway…..the friend said to me….literally out of no where, “Why don’t you host a foreign exchange student this fall?”

I was taken by surprise. I had never thought of it before…..never even considered it. I am sure that I hesitated….really not knowing what to say. Actually, at that time, I had no idea what was involved in hosting a foreign exchange student….or even how to go about getting one. I had no idea what impact it would have on my life….whether I would like it or not…..whether I was suited to such a role or not…… But, he plowed on….telling me all the advantages: companionship, great learning experience, become familiar with another culture, promoting international understanding…….all of that kind of stuff.

Actually, I think he was merely trying to help out his area coordinator….who I am sure was being pressured from above to place students. After several minutes of discussion, he finally said, “Well, just talk to the area coordinator….and then you can make up your mind.” He promised to give her my telephone number so she could contact me…….and she did! Almost immediately.

We set up an appointment for an evening two or three days later…..after I had given her detailed instructions on how to find my house. This was in the days before the rural roads were numbered and each house had an address. In the meantime, she had sent me an application form to fill out.

Not knowing what to expect…..I spent the next day or two thoroughly cleaning the house. It was immaculate. On the appointed evening, the area coordinator and a friend (I think she was afraid she would get lost.) showed up. After she explained the program and showed me a lot of propaganda, I asked her if she would like to see the rest of the house. If I hadn’t volunteered…..somehow I don’t think she would have asked. Anyway, she said, Yes….she would take a look at the room where the student would be sleeping. After a casual glance……she said now I could choose the student that I wanted.

Somehow…..and I still do not understand why…..she showed me only TWO students. Those, apparently, were my choices…..the ones I had to choose from. Maybe those were the only two students left….or maybe they were the only ones who seem to fit with the information on my application form. But….I looked at them. I didn’t know…..they looked pretty similar…..six of one; half a dozen of the other, as my mother used to say. They were both from Germany. I ended up choosing one of them…..and that was it. She told me that she would be in touch on a specific day about two or three days later……and they left.

There was a problem, though. I was leaving for a vacation in Colorado the next day. No problem….. She gave me her telephone number and told me to call her.

On the appointed evening, I called her from my motel room. “You have a new son!” she told me. And, that is how I got into the business of hosting foreign exchange students.

Luckily for me, the choice was a good one. No….an excellent one. And, except for a couple notable bad experience, my choices were excellent for the next ten years.

But……hold on….. the story doesn’t end there. I went to Kansas City International Airport to pick up my student. I had seen only one rather bad picture of him. (This was long before we had Internet.) The plane landed….the passengers all started filing through the gate into the waiting area. I kept looking and looking for my student. All the passengers had gotten off the airplane…..and I was standing there wondering where my student was….what had happened to him. I was starting to get a mild feeling of panic. Had he missed his connection? Had he changed his mind and decided not to come? Had he had some sort of problems with Immigration Services? Had he seen me….and decided that he was going to go back home?

As I was standing there trying to figure out my next move, somebody tapped me on the shoulder from behind. I turned to see a young man standing there….obviously about as nervous as I was. “Are you Beryl?” he asked. (Actually he said, “Are you “barrel”…which is how all of my students pronounced my name when they first arrived.)

“Yes……”

“I am Sebastian.”

No wonder I didn’t recognize him. In all of the pictures I saw of him…..he had long hair….down almost to his shoulders. And, here, standing before me was a clean-cut young man with short, well-trimmed hair. I would never have guessed! No doubt, he had been advised by the exchange student agency to trim him hair……and look a little neater.

Another coincidence: As Sebastian continued to live with me throughout the 1993 school year, he often talked about his friends. And he often talked to one of his friends who was also an exchange student somewhere in the U.S.A. Over time….and after listening to several of these discussions and telephone calls…..I began to put two and two together. One day I asked him about his friend…..What is his name? Where is he from? Then I found the two student profiles that the area coordinator had given to me as my two choices. And…..Yes, you have probably guessed it: The other choice I had to choose from was his best friend.

I later met the “other” kid on one of my trips to Germany. He, too, was a super kid. But, I have never questioned my choice…..which was the right one.

So……that is how it all got started……and it has never ended. Although I no longer host foreign exchange student, for the reasons that I detailed earlier, I have branched out into a similar….and equally satisfying….endeavor. Instead of hosting high school students, who are almost totally dependent up on me for transportation, support, and supervision, I now open my home to adult travelers. These are paying guests….although I rarely ask for anything except that they buy some food now and then. They are adults, and they are expected to take care of themselves…..although most of them do not have their own transportation and I end up driving them. I am not responsible for them in any way……although I gladly give advice and counsel….when asked….and sometimes, even if I am not asked.

But…..back to the exchange students. I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed my first experience. When the ten months were finished….I hated to see him go…..and I think he hated to leave. (At least, I would like to think so.) As usually happens….with him and with most of the others….we had formed a bond of lifelong friendship. When my first exchange student left…..he didn’t want me to get another student. He wanted to be the only one. The one I would remember forever.

But, it didn’t happen that way. Over the years, I had several more students…..each of whom I will remember forever.

More about them later. In the meantime, I will enjoy being their American Dad…..and their kids’ gray headed American grandfather.

 

Oh, Wow!  I can feel it coming on.  I am seeing visions;  I am am having flashbacks; I am being transported into strange, but wonderful and exciting land.  I seem to have an affliction. I think is can safely be diagnosed as “Travel Fever”.

Traveling….anywhere….here in the U.S.A. or around the world…..has long been one of the things that I like to do most. If I were rich, I am sure that I would probably be sitting in some strange, exotic, foreign land almost all of the time……and for the most part, I really don’t care where it is……just somewhere else. It is rather strange how I got caught up in this desire to travel. Back in the “old days”, I really didn’t go anywhere. I had no desire to……until one night in May, 1962. I was living in Hutchinson in a cramped two room apartment. The school year had ended, and one night one of my friends from my home town of Sterling came down to my apartment. We were sitting around talking. The subject turned to the World’s Fair which was currently underway in Seattle, Washington. Somehow, suddenly…..spontaneously…..we thought it would be a great idea if could go see it. No….we were both perfectly sober. And….No…..those who know me are aware that I am not a “spontaneous” person! It is just not my nature to do things on the spur of the moment…..without thinking about it…..and especially without making almost minute by minute plans. But…..Yes….I was still very young then…..still almost a puppy…..although an almost grown puppy. I did stupid things back then….did things sometimes without thinking of the consequences….sometimes without even knowing what I was really doing. Maybe that is why I have changed so much today…..driving friends insane with my constant need to plan every event in my life with great care and in great detail. Not that taking a trip to the West Coast was stupid. It is just that this was the first major solo trip of my life……and it came about almost by accident…..without prior warning. Within a few hours….literally…. we had packed my little red Volkswagen Bug…..and we were on our way. On our way to the West Coast…..on our way to Seattle…..where ever that was! We had no plan. How could we? It was only a few hours earlier that we had decided to make the trip. But, obviously, we headed in the right direction…..because we did eventually end up in Seattle…..and at the World’s Fair. I would say that details of the trip are sketchy……but that wouldn’t be quite true. Most of the details are simply non-existent! We picked up maps from service stations…..they were free back then, believe it or not…..and we must have planned our trip on an almost minute by minute basis. We had no tent. When evening came, we found a comfortable spot off the highway…..almost always near a stream or a creek or a lake…..unrolled our sleeping bags…..started a small fire where ever we could…..and went to sleep under the stars. Many mornings we would wake up covered with dew, our sleeping bags almost drenched from the nighttime condensation. I often wonder how many times we trespassed on private property. But….nobody seemed to care…..certainly not us. We took a bath in streams or creeks…..ate sandwiches…..carried a cooler with some ice and water…..took enough clothing to last for two weeks…..listened to the car radio. We thought….and felt like….we were big dogs. Two or three nights we slept on the beach…..something that is illegal today…..and maybe was back then, too. We gathered some drift wood, started a fire, and enjoyed the sound of the crashing waves as they lulled us to sleep. Offer me a million dollars to reconstruct the route we took as we traveled both to and from Kansas on that trip. Go ahead…..offer! You are safe. You are not going to lose any money. I have no idea how we got there…..and I have no idea how we got back. But…..I do know we made it. I have pictures to prove it. Speaking of pictures. They are the only reference I have to indicate where we went….the territory we covered. Although I have no clear recollection of the places…..we visited Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone National Park, the Pacific Coast….both in Washington and in Oregon…..Reno, Salt Lake City and Rocky Mountain National Park. Like I said…..I know this only because of the black and white pictures that I took.. We spent two or three days visiting a cousin in south central Washington. He had a dairy farm at the time…..and he raised hops. We spent most of our days moving irrigation pipes, feeding hay to the cattle….whatever else needed to be done. And….we had a blast doing it. Only three places come to mind when I try to recall this trip: The Space Needle, the Pacific Coast, Salt Lake City…..and my cousin’s farm, of course. All of these were a “first”, of course. And, two of them I never forgot! The Pacific Coast….and Salt Lake City. This was a great trip….even if I can’t remember the details. It probably was the event that turned me on to travel! And….I liked it! Then….one day I got a letter from my local selective service board inviting me to become a part of the U.S. Army. To say that I did not want to go to the Army is vastly understating the situation. But….this was one of those “command performance” sort of deals. So….I went. And….I liked it! While I was stationed at Ft. Benjamin Harrison, Indiana, I had a very desirable job. I was administrative assistant to the commander. I was happy there….and my boss was happy……and I was also good at my job. Then one day, I got another invitation…..an invitation to give up my desirable job on the outskirts of Indianapolis and go to South Vietnam. I wanted to decline the “invitation”, but Uncle Sam insisted that I honor the invitation. So…..I went to South Vietnam. And…..again…..I liked it. Again I had a very desirable job. I was secretary to the Adjutant General of the U. S. Army in Vietnam. A very good job. I liked my job…..my boss liked me….and I did a very good job. While I was in South Vietnam, I was given the opportunity to take several short trips in Southeast Asia…..Hong Kong, Manila, Bangkok…..while some of our airplanes were receiving maintenance. These places were exciting and fascinating….a world that I had never known before. And, I liked it. When I left the Army, I had a wonderful opportunity to return to South Vietnam with an organization called the International Voluntary Services. After a year of teaching English in a provincial capital called Phan Rang…..I was promoted to the position of Chief of Education. In this position, I had as many as 72 teachers working under me. Part of my job was to visit them in their local town and give them support. I spent three years in this position….and during this three years, I was able to travel to many of the countries in Southeast Asia….Hong Kong, Philippines, Japan, Cambodia, Malaysia, Singapore, Laos, Taiwan. There may have been others, but those are the ones that come to mind. I had been bitten by the Travel bug….I had contracted Travel Fever……and I never recovered from it. It was these experiences that hooked me on travel. I recall that very first trip to the Pacific Coast with a great deal of fondness, nostalgia….and wistfulness…….and for several years, I limited my travel to places in the U.S.A……mostly the Oregon Coast…..and points in-between. During these trips, I became much more modern and sophisticated in my travels. I now owned a tent…..and I added a camper shell and a foam rubber mattress to the back of my pickup. Now I could travel in style and comfort. Well…..relatively. It was better than sleeping on the ground under the stars…..sort of. In fact, I have been to every state west of the Mississippi River……and most of them to the east, too. The next major event in my life was hosting my first foreign exchange student…..a student from Germany. I made my first trip to Europe in 1995….and I have returned there….mostly to Germany….almost every year since then. Sometimes more than one time a year. My first “grand tour” of Europe was in 1995…..in the summer time. Although I have made return visits to Europe three or four times in the summer, I quickly discovered that traveling in the “off season” is much cheaper. And for a not-too-well-paid school teacher, that was very important. For the next several years, most of my trips were made during whatever vacation time we had in the school year…..most of the time during cold months….but with a few summer trips thrown in now and then when I could afford it. After I retired, I discovered that the month of April is the most ideal month for me to travel. After a rather long string of rather unsatisfactory “house sitters”……I had a dog….and I also burned wood, at the time…..I almost became reluctant to leave home. Would these house sitters take adequate care of my dog? Would I come back home to find that my house had burned down…..reduced to a pile of ashes? My last wonderful dog, Abby, died in 2004. And while it was a wrenching experience for me….it left me free to travel almost any time I wanted. By April, it was warm enough to simply lock the house and take off. So far, I have visited eleven countries in Europe…..with several more on my “bucket list”. I spent the summer of 1989 working in Yellowstone National Park…..and the summer of 2006 working in Big Bend National Park. Both of these jobs were interesting and rewarding experiences…..although in vastly different ways. During my travels, I have seen sites, experienced things and met people that I never even dreamed of before I served in the U.S. Army. It is one of those blessings in disguise that people talk about, I suppose. You never know what you are missing until you try it….and I am glad that I tried it. It is a lot better to be hooked on travel than a lot of other things that I can think of. An extra added benefit of my travel experiences has been the decision to host a wide variety of foreign travelers, that I met through a couple international hospitality organizations. Some stay for a couple days…..some for a couple months. I have hosted a strange and exotic bunch of people: Europeans, Asians, Africans, Americans. Christians, Buddhists, Jews, Muslims. And also a couple of communists from China….thrown in to make the mix more diverse…..and to add an element of political intrigue….although neither of these guys could have cared less about such stuff. Not were these guests interesting people from whom I have learn much….although I rarely agree with them….but hopefully, they have learned equally as much from me……and I have made some life long friend. And now I also have a place to stay (for free) in my future travels. Until now, I have visited twenty-one different countries…..and I hope that I can visit at least that many more in the future. In my way of looking at things….travel is never time spent unwisely….and is a good investment for the money spent. So why do I travel? I don’t know. Maybe it is because I feel that it enriches my life. Makes me more aware that there is somewhere else besides Kansas. Maybe it makes me appreciate coming back home to Kansas after spending time in places so vastly different from the life I lead here in my rural Kansas setting…..and, I always do. But, more than anything else, I think it broadens my life. It gives me a perspective of the world that I would not and could not have if I had not traveled to these places. Now I have a “feel” about how these people live….what kind of life they live…..what kind of problems they face. I have learned not to stereotype all the people of different nationalities, races, cultures, religions, and ethnic backgrounds. Just like here in the U.S.A……here in Kansas….there are “good” people, and there are “bad” people. We have mostly law-abiding citizens…..but we also have criminals; we have those people who spread love…..and we also have people who spread hate; we have people who practice the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do to you.”…..but we also have our share of bigoted people who preach love and peace……but in their daily life are intolerant, vindictive, dogmatic, hateful and racist…..mostly in the name of religion or politics. As I have traveled in the U.S.A. and around the world, I have found that the vast majority of people are dedicated to providing a good life for their children and family. They go to work in the morning, do their job, and come back home to rest and to enjoy their family. And, I have found that they…..just like us…..want to live in peace. But…..on a more personal level: I doubt if all the traveling I have done has made me a “better” person than anybody else in the true sense of the word. After all, we are all about the same, no matter where we have been or what we have done. But…..to me, at least, it has vastly enriched my life. I know there is life beyond the boundaries of my township or even my state. And, I have a much better understanding of how people live and what they are like because I have been there….I have seen it…..I have walked among them…..I have experienced the culture and the life style. I have met the people. I have observed their behavior. When I say that I have eaten Chinese food….or Italian food…..or Mexican food…..or German food. I really have. Not in a Chinese buffet…or a Pizza Hut….or a Taco Bell….or an Olive Garden…… But, I have sat down in native eating places…..far off the beaten paths of tourists….and have eaten food prepared by natives…for natives. I have stood in front of….taken pictures of…..explored…..buildings and monuments that most people only see in pictures or on TV travel shows. I have walked the avenues of great cities. I have sat in the neighborhood bars with the local people. I have lived in their homes. I have watched their TV programs (although somebody had to tell me what they were saying). I have traveled for miles on city buses, crossed countries riding second or third class on trains. I have taken automobile trips through the countryside….through the small villages and towns where foreigners seldom venture. I have witnessed local and national celebrations and holidays. I have been present during political unrest and revolt….as well as riots and demonstrations. It is more of a personal thing, I suppose. I found out long ago that nobody is really very interested in where I have been…..and certainly not looking at the 12,000 pictures that I have taken. I think my life is richer, more fulfilled….and that I am more empathetic and sympathetic to the lives, feelings, cultures, and ways of living of people in our rapidly shrinking global village. Yes…..long ago I contracted Travel Fever……and I don’t know what the cure is. And, I don’t want to know. It is the best kind of affliction that I can imagine. In fact, I would like to pass it on to everybody I know.And I do not want to be cured. Because….I like it.